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Caught In The Middle: How to Talk About Homosexuality

This resource was written by Jonathan Inman

We often find ourselves in awkward situations in which holding to a biblical view of homosexuality will be controversial. In the office, at school, at a party, at church, in conversations with family, friends or neighbors – talking about what you believe concerning homosexuality can be very difficult.

When talking with people who believe homosexuality is an acceptable lifestyle option, suggesting that homosexuality is sinful can appear stupid and rude – if not homophobic, unloving and abusive. When dealing with people who think homosexuals are simply sick perverts, it can appear wishy-washy, compromising, liberal and unbiblical to suggest that God loves and forgives sinners who struggle with homosexuality, and that we should do the same.

Different people are tempted in different ways when placed in these situations. Many of us want to sidestep the issue and avoid an unpleasant incident, concerned that the gospel message will get lost or distorted in the conflict, or that people will get the wrong impression and no longer listen. Sometimes we just don’t want to bother with the hassle. Others of us can get so frustrated with those who hold to and promote destructive falsehoods that we show little Christ-likeness as we set out to clearly indicate exactly how we think the persons with whom we are speaking are wrong.

The issue of homosexuality takes these rather common relational dynamics and amplifies them. Discussion of homosexuality evokes strong emotions and responses, especially when people disagree, and touches on fundamental convictions about right and wrong, love and justice, heaven and hell. The responsibility of Christians to be both prophets and peacemakers in the midst of heated debate requires us to turn again to the Scriptures for guidance as to how we should represent Christ in a fallen world.[Harvest USA]

To view the complete PDF, click here.

Originally published by the title, “Guidelines for Christians CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE.” Copyright 1999, 2000 HARVEST USA. All rights reserved. Adapted for use with KJV version by permission of HARVEST USA. Adapted by permission by Apostolic Christian Counseling and Family Services. Can be freely copied and redistributed. Not to be sold. For more information about sexual identity please visit

For Further Information:

Sexual and Gender Identity Institute (SGII)
This site provides information and resources about Sexuality Identity Therapy (SIT) developed to help individuals with same-sex attraction and gender identity issues seek congruence so that their behavior and sexual identity line up with their beliefs and values. [SGII]

Restoring Sexual Identity: Hope for Women Who Struggle with Same-Sex Attraction 
Author: Anne Paulk
This 279-page book is written for women dealing with same-sex attraction. It is good for individuals struggling with this problem as well as for those who want to help them. The author does a good job of balancing compassion with maintaining biblical standards. She writes from the perspective of someone who has left the homosexual lifestyle.


When Homosexuality Hits Home: What to Do When a Loved One Says, “I’m Gay”
Authors: Joe Dallas
This 224-page book is written for family members of individuals dealing with homosexuality. It provides a solidly biblical perspective that is both compassionate and practical. The author provides helpful principles to assist the family members navigate relationship challenges and opportunities.

Restored Hope Network
This site is dedicated to restoring hope to those broken by sexual and relational sin, especially those impacted by homosexuality. It offers mentored programs, biblical instruction, informative articles, and personal accounts of victory. [RHN]