How Can I Be Helpful to a Believer Who Identifies as LGBTQ?

  • It is essential we support professing disciples of Christ who are dealing with same-sex attraction and gender identity issues. We must start by understanding their situation and listening to their story.
  • Keep in view that Jesus changes who we are in a moment and transforms us over a lifetime. While we may have temptations and tendencies toward specific sins, acting upon them is out of step with who we are in him. This is the good news of Jesus to us all. We are not identified by our attractions and human tendencies, but instead by Christ!
  • Interact with the professing LGBTQ Christian according to the following goals:
    • See them as God does: beloved. Not by their brokenness, but by their wholeness in Christ. Urge them toward identification in Christ.
    • Be a friend. The loved one in your life needs friendship and companionship, just like you do. The blessing of Christian friendship and fellowship is a gift from God.
    • Learn from them. Very often the LGBTQ community has a lot to teach the Church in the way of friendship, hospitality, and reception.
    • Learn about the LGBTQ experience and how to support. Many times, well-meaning people simply don’t have enough or accurate information to provide biblically accurate and practical helps. Additional information and helps can be found at this link.
    • Support singleness as a vocation. Singleness is a growing trend in our culture. Furthermore, the church has a long history of God-ordained purpose for the single. At every opportunity, undergird and support the single calling.
    • Help steward obedience to God’s Word. Hope for flourishing, satisfaction and settled identity lie in God. His commands promote and do not prohibit that flourishing, satisfaction and peace.
    • Help them understand God’s high regard for their physical body. Jesus sanctioned the human body when He took it on in the incarnation and again in the resurrection. Allow the body then, to speak to us and inform us about who we are and how our bodies function.
    • Be a humble learner. We all have much to learn. Being willing to grow in this area means being willing to learn what words mean and to non-intrusively ask questions.

A great many voices speak into the issues surrounding LGBTQ. Each one attempts to make sense of experience in light of truth as they see it. Apostolic Christian Counseling and Family Services is no different. We engage this topic believing that God is the Creator, and each human has been created in his image and for his glory. We understand the Bible to be God’s Word and our source of truth. We believe in the historic Christian view of marriage as the covenanted union between one man and one woman. We believe each of us has been touched by the brokenness of this world, and yet, God works in our broken circumstances to align our hearts to his.

For Further Information

Homosexuality and the Christian: A Guide for Parents, Pastors, and Friends
Author: Mark Yarhouse
This 218-page book provides readers with a clearer understanding of homosexuality by focusing on the various aspects of sexual identity.  Using a three-tier model for separating same-sex attraction and homosexual orientation from a gay identity, the author lays out how an identity in Christ script can be developed to help individuals integrate their identity around their biblical values and beliefs. Suggestions are given for how individuals and churches can stand by those dealing with same-sex attraction and who are seeking to live in obedience to biblical truth in all areas of their lives.

Living Out is an organization dedicated to helping same sex attracted Christians live a biblically focused, healthy, and fulfilled life in Christ and supported by their church communities.

Sexual and Gender Identity Institute (SGII)
This institute at Wheaton College is directed by Mark Yarhouse, PsyD and provides information and resources to help individuals with same-sex attraction and gender identity issues seek congruence between their religious beliefs and values their sexual and gender identity.  [SGII]