Reflection For Couples

How is your Marriage?

Nurturing a healthy Christ centered marriage takes intentionality and consistency. One helpful way to encourage continued growth in your marriage is by scheduling periodic check-ups where you sit down together and consider how each of you are doing within the marriage. Scripture provides us with a wealth of principles to consider when evaluating our marriage relationship. Below is a list of scriptural principles and questions that can be used to develop specific and concrete ways to regularly enrich your marriage.

First, I would encourage you and your spouse to consider talking through some guidelines regarding how you would like to spend your time together. Reflect on the following list together:

  • Schedule a repeating appointment on your calendar to sit down and meet to review the check-up questions.
  • Rather than reviewing all of the questions in one setting, consider taking 2 – 3 questions from this list to review with each other quarterly. This will allow you to implement changes in small, but significant ways and seem less overwhelming.
  • Pray together and ask the Lord to prepare your heart and guide your conversation and time together.
  • Remember to validate and give thanks for the things going well in your marriage.
  • Consider taking turns asking each other questions from the corresponding lists below.
  • Answer each question honestly and with respect. Remember to honor each other’s perspective on what he or she believes is true.
  • Confess and ask for forgiveness as appropriate if you have hurt your spouse.
  • At the end of your meeting time, pray for God’s blessing and help to “walk in love” toward each other. (Ephesians 5:1-2)

To view list of questions & PDF click on booklet or handout.

For Further Information:

The Marriage Journal
Authors: Jeremy & Audrey Roloff
This journal includes a short devotional and 6 questions that you will ask each other, and record your answers to, once a week. The journal is designed to deepen your connection throughout an entire year.

Learning to Love an Imperfect Man
This article, written by Gary Thomas, provides some helpful information about how realistic expectations can lead to contentment within marriage. In addition, he shares Scripture for meditation and things to consider in moving toward an appreciation and deeper affection for your spouse.